A Curious Girl: God at work

Take the Which Star Wars Hero are You? Quiz!

...created by Kenzie.

Boyish charm? (To be Yoda, I wanted :) )

Anyhow, how is everyone? I've been feeling anti-social lately. Not to be confused with embittered/lonely/shy. Just generally not talking to people much. I haven't been on msn in ages - I went on on Tuesday to see if Sara was on, but only very briefly. Bry was on - if it was you, Sara, I'm sorry :( Not that I'm avoiding Bry, or anyone, just I haven't felt like talking. And this is bad. I mean, it's not bad that I like being alone, I can live with that. It's bad that I'm not reaching out. I ought to care about people. I mean... I do care about people. But I ought to do something about it.

I'm not sure why this is. Maybe it's just that lunchtimes and breaks are becoming too much! I mean, I never used to hang around with so many people. That sounds a bit pathetic. In fact, it sounds very pathetic.

I've also been getting all angsty over uni. Clive asked me 'How much do you want to go to Uni?' What is he saying? I think he thinks I may drop out. But I do want to go to uni. A really scary thought is that I'll just stay here all my life, get a boring job and maybe eventually produce the novel we've all been waiting for. Mad as I am about writing, I don't want to be a full time writer. A lot of my writing is escapism, and spending my entire life doing that would be like spending it watching television. Argh. And then I got really frightened that maybe I'll never do all the grand stuff I planned to do... and in a freaky sort of way, even becoming a massively successful writer would not come into comparison with generally helping people out. Entertaining people for a living is one thing, but loving people for a living is what I want to do. I don't need to go to uni to do that, necessarily, but I do to be a teacher. Anyways, I am trying not to be freaked, and hoping I won't be too intimidated by the revision I have to do to pass my A-levels... *sigh*.

I had work Saturday. Remember the daydream entry? One of my daydreams actually happened.

Someone's least favourite teacher from school comes in. Whilst I would not wish this on anyone, I think if it did happen it would be amusing to watch. Would the teacher give the person a hard time? Would their student/ex-student find subtle ways of getting revenge? Would they simply ignore each other?

Why did it have to be that one? I avoided him most of the time. The worst part of it is, I wouldn't even dislike him if he hadn't been my teacher, or if I'd done well in his course. Seeing him again reminded me that I still held it against him that I'd done so badly. Anyhow, after thinking many vindictive thoughts, it was too much. I really had/have to forgive him. I'm muddling the tenses there because I've been praying about it. I think I've forgiven him (that sounds odd, doesn't it? ;)) But I don't think I can be sure of myself until I see him next.

Work Sunday was good. Yep, it was. I was on the door, leading people to seats. Well, one man was rude to me (*sigh*) but despite the long queues, I handled it fairly well! Some people were really cool about the whole thing. One man, when I told him it'd be about fifteen minutes, told me he doubted it would be that long... when I seated him, he said, 'See? Not fifteen minutes.' (His wife butted in with 'It's the worst case scenario!') I also got mildly chatted up, which was actually sort of nice. I'd told a guy he could go sit down on the bench, and he asked if I'd like to sit with him! I said, 'Yes, I'd love to, but unfortunately I have this job to do.' At the end of my shift, Jim, one of the assistant managers, told me I'd done really well. Wow... It's quite amazing that this was the particular job I was most scared of in the early days. Even bigger announcement than 'I don't hate my job' has got to be 'I'm grateful for my job'. I'm grateful for those horrible first few weeks, because they taught me things I couldn't have learned any other way.

Phew, what else? Invasion has been mixed. Wednesday was quite good, minimum of chaos considering! The boys all call me Womble. The most worrying thing is that I answer to it. I admit it, I think it's quite a cute nickname :) I think they don't agree, but never mind. Maybe tomorrow, in Alive our new specifically Christian lunchtime club!!, which we hold in a music room, I will grab a recorder and practise the Wombles Theme Tune on it. I used to be able to play it, along with Blackadder :)

Alive is a new, fresh thing. It does us (read - the Christian Union) good to have a shake up every now and again, I think the newness of it gives us some energy. We've had one session so far, in which the new people were Tinashe and Rob, two non-sixth form people! and Angie and Hannah, student teachers. I must remember to call Angie by her teacher name when she's in the science dept though. She teaches biology. Tomorrow we're doing a question and answer thing, for people with questions about Christianity. Some of our posters got ripped down. Chris seemed worried/annoyed, but I was less so, I think. Maybe it's because I expected it to some degree, with people like 'Evil' Dave around (the goth who suggested Kentucky Fried Christians. He uses Evil Dave as a username. Chelle's ex, going out with Ellie, for long time readers of this diary) :). I don't think Dave would have done it, personally (I don't think he cares that much), but I think there are people sharing his attitude who might. Anyhoo, we put up five more posters today to replace the two taken down... mwahahaha... And oddly enough, I'm not worried about tomorrow. I suddenly remembered all the stuff at Detling and what Chris was saying from Soul Survivor, about God working through us... And essentially, what happens tomorrow, is God's plan. We're just the go-between. What God decides goes, and he'll give us the words to say.

Usually, I don't have this kind of attitude! It's odd, I haven't been the greatest Christian at all this week. But it's so obvious to me that God is at work. Awesome love.

I took the McDonalds test, and guess what I got?

You can take the

McDonalds Product Test by Matio64

here!

Yes, it's the only McDonald's product I will walk into McDonalds by choice to buy! I'm so chuffed.

Random word for today:

<< last entry ... next entry >>
top of page

Give food for free.