A Curious Girl: I'm bored of clever descriptions

OK, no more Dido lyrics, for now anyway :)

I went to Eden... youth/alternative worship event starring Andy Flanaghan who was rather cool, and plasticine, paint, dance, and God :)

For the first half I mostly wandered around aimlessly and cried. Exams. Future. Leaving school.

Strange... I didn't want anyone to see me crying some in some way I was desperate to have someone see me crying! help me out here! Eventually I went back to the sung worship zone and cried for a bit there, and Tricia, James's Mum (who knows my exam timetable better than I do!) came over and asked if I wanted her mum (Vera!) to pray for me. I said yes, so Vera came over and I told her what was bothering me, and she prayed for me, and all the time Tricia was hugging me too, I just felt so safe and loved. And before Vera came, Lucy came over and hugged me too. Vera told me that God has promised never to let me go, he'll be with me from now until Eternity. I felt a bit better, and after that, I went to the art zone to play with some plasticine... I had some fun with that :) Shem, Lucy's brother, made a tree, and then Lucy came over and made a smiley face. I made a house on a rock, only it looked more like a mushroom, so I didn't take it home with me... but I did take my other model. Lucy gave me her smiley face, and put it in the cup in which I had planted a seed earlier.

Perhaps you are afraid of the future. Will spring ever come, or will the seeds of my faith die in the cold, dark earth?

You can see the full size picture here.

At the end, there was more sung worship, so I went ahead and did that - there was a song called 'I surrender'. Andy encouraged us to go up for prayer if we knew there was anything else we needed to surrender. I sung for a bit more, but I knew I was going to have to go pray.

I found Stuart (James's Dad!) and said I wanted to pray with someone, and it was Tricia who prayed for me in the end :) I was much less tearful, and felt quiet, at peace... God was (is) near, as we were praying I saw myself walking along a path the light was shining on. Tricia pointed to the smiley face and said 'That's how God feels!' and I just wanted God to take everything. Vera had said something odd earlier 'These are God's exams'. I know better than to jump up and say, 'Yay, he'll do all the work!' but as we prayed, I realised that God knows exactly what's going to happen. He knows that I'm not perfect. But he's leading me through. If these exams are for God, instead of them being a hardship, something I have to fight through and pass at all costs, they're actually part of his plan... so... promise me you won't think I'm insane but... they actually become a pleasure to take! If I do my best, I know God's promised to bring his best out of them.

I remember the parable of the talents... the one I dislike :) Probably because the fear of mucking up would probably make me go and bury my talent too, anything to avoid losing it. Our minister, Dave, reassured up when he preached on it that God only gives us as much as we can handle. Essentially, he's saying we should do our best. But we're not working on an impossible task, we're not asked to get grades we aren't good enough for, to go straight off and do some great work that converts ten people per day. When we surrender our talents to his purpose, they're used his way.

I feel really light and happy :) I know he's prepared everything before me... he has a plan, he has a way. I love Jesus :D

Random word for today:

<< last entry ... next entry >>
top of page

Give food for free.