A Curious Girl: Girls who like boys and girls who like girls

To the person who signed my guestbook today (you know who you are); Don't worry, I know! I meant it as a legitimate, albeit unlikely possibility in the same way it is possible for a heterosexual man.

Now! On to the entry.

Watched the second half of Caraline's story today. It was awful. "I thought, if I can peel the fat from my thighs I can wipe away the sins of the fathers..." "Sometimes I just want my mother to be here, but she isn't, and I'm too old for a mum now aren't I?" "I'm not just made of bones flesh and calcium, but years of abuse." "This little girl gets hungry every day, and I can't feed her. I can't look after her." "With my mum it was like, 'You'll get something to eat when I'm hungry, when I'm ready you'll go to the toilet.' We couldn't even respond to our own basic needs."

Nothing went right for Caraline, except that she left her parents' grasp. She never had a proper childhood, never proper parents. She knew what was wrong with her, knew her problems, but never how to solve them, except by crowding out the nightmares by starving and forcing herself to think about food, and by controlling the food she ate, so that once and for all she had power over something she did. It was sad, watching her cry and say that she knew there were people worse off, and all her trouble was in the past, but she couldn't make it go away. I wish I could have done something, but now it's too late. She died.

The bus was extremely late this morning, and so Crystal (who gets my bus) and I went to look to get the earliest bus from Chatham. The Twydall Bus was due in 8:15, the 132 two minutes later, so we got that one as it gets to Rainham quicker. I think the grammar in that sentence was wrong, but I'm feeling Cha-umaeze today. Despite sharing at least one bus and Psychology, Crystal and I hardy ever talk, so it was quite cool to talk over stuff. Got to school a bit late, but I just breezed in and blamed it on Arriva.

Abi has a girlfriend!! Good for her. She said, "I suppose you think I'm really immoral." Well firstly, go for the loophole; nothing in the Bible objects to lesbian partners! (Thank you Sinead o'Connor for pointing that out) She is my friend, and I want her to be happy and do the things that she believes are truly right. You have to try to keep by your own standards (granted, I'm not all too great at this and I suspect other people know how I feel) because then no-one can accuse you of doing wrong. So if you're reading this Abi, don't worry, I only think you're immoral if you do.

Random word for today:

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