A Curious Girl: A good day at last

For once, it has been a good day.

Last night, in between homework and stuff, I worried about the future. I'm going to be honest here, although you'll think I'm weird. I probably am.

Usually when I pray, I just wait for God to reply in his own time, like some kind of divine e-mailing service. Sometimes, though, I ask for signs.

One I had a while back. This was when I was wondering if I should be a doctor, and I used the flick-through-the-pages-of-the-Bible method which half the Christian world embraces and half says is absolute nonsense. At the time, I was the embracing type (I still am :-) ) so I decided that if I opened it at a book by Luke (who was a doctor) I would take that as my direction. I opened it at the page with this note on it-

"The Gospel of Luke is the longest New Testament book, with 1,151 verses. And the book of Acts - which Luke also wrote - isn't far behind. Since Luke was a doctor, a simple prescription probably took reams of paper!"

So I opened it at exactly the page in which I had learned this.

Later on I switched to the 'nonsense' group (because it didn't suit me any more) so I made another prayer with an interesting method which is fairly similar.

I wondered whether I should leave school and do something else, so my prayer was - "If I should leave school, have th telephone ring in the next fifteen minutes."

What a nut. So I waited. Nothing.

Depressed, I went to church feeling a bit dejected, but deep down I knew that I /wanted/ to get away from work, not do what God wants. And then I thought - Could I be a doctor?

I sometimes think that God must get rather annoyed at all the stupid methods I think up for him to tell me what he wants of me.

I don't know, but I now have perhaps one late piece of homework as opposed to about four and for some reason I've made a resolution to get my work sorted out. I have Unit 1 chem in January, so I'd better work. And funnily enough, although I worked for flipping ages this evening, I feel much better. Psychology is done. Chemistry is mostly done - I have homework for next week, but that's not so urgent. English Lit. is done. Biology is finished apart from one question. I am pleased.

Chemistry today was a bit of a non-event, heating carbonates and not recording the results because we didn't get any. English was interesting enough. During my free I at last finished my Biology. During Psychology Mrs. T resolved to come in looking like a Sweaty tomorrow. We told her she'd have to dye her hair black. Does she have the nerve?

There is a rumour that Ms. Jardin is going out with Mr. C, a drama teacher.

Let me tell you about these people.

Ms. Jardin was my Year Nine English teacher, and in some ways she was to me as Fiona (in Nicola's diary) was to Nicola. She was the one who encouraged my writing, cultivated me into a better poet and helped me in many ways. She was young, fun and interesting; and a bit feministic, and most young interesting female teachers seem to be. She left to go to Scotland last Christmas.

Mr. C is a drama teacher who would have only known Ms. Jardin for a term unless they had had a previous aquaintance. He is fun, lively and extroverted; he played Captain Tempest in 'Return to the Forbidden Planet'.

According to Sara, according to Chelle, Ms. Jardin was at a drama performance and somehow this equates to them going out. Why Ms. Jardin was no longer in Scotland I have no idea.

I think they'd make a lovely couple. But never mind.

I nearly dropped off on the bus on the way home - tell a lie, I *did* drop off on the bus, between the Chatham end of Rochester and Strood High Street. I kept regaining consciousness, but I never really woke up until someone behind me banged the window hard. I was annoyed by this, but seeing as I didn't want to sleep past my stop, I did nothing.

Ooh well. Nicola seems to be happier too - how do we all reach our peaks at the same time? Abi says her anti-depressants are working, Sara seems cheerful enough. Dave is out of hospital. As for me, I seem to be having some kind of spontaneous recovery. Or covery, seeing I have nothing to recover to, I've been bone-idle my entire life. I keep changing. And suddenly I seem to want to do work, sort out my folders and keep going. I even have an idea for the Arts Competition at last that is not going to take reams of paper or expose my friends. Excellent.

Of course I still have that damn research on Japanese Americans, but you can't have everything.

Bad news is, Richard H (Christina's ex before Adam) is now no longer a Christian. I am sad about this. But what can I say? It's his choice.

Ah well, better go check my e-mail.

(note - the entry was put in late as Clive disconnected before I'd finished)

Random word for today:

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