A Curious Girl: Reaching out

Been feeling a little detached lately - although I've received a lovely long e-mail from Nicky which was nice, but Internet Explorer conked out (lovely term) before I'd finished replying. How annoying.

Having trouble talking to God. Read an interesting site by an ex-Christian - actually I found it comforting. That on its own sounds like madness, but when you consider that my responses to his criticisms of Christianity were, to me at least, fairly sound contradictions, I'm OK about it. And I read The Color Purple at last (used American spelling because it's the spelling on the book). It's very good - although I think I can see why Dr. A II has such objections to it. It deals with the kind of things he doesn't at all care about. But it really engaged me - I didn't agree with everything in it, but I can say at least that I thoroughly enjoyed it. And what's odd it that there's an element of the debate on what makes a man, and what makes a woman. That kind of thing - which behaviour belongs to which. The kind of stuff I was going on about last entry.

I'm not sure why I'm feeling far from God at the moment - probably what I said in my entry after Stratford. Trouble is, I don't feel like I can really talk about that to anyone. So instead I stick it in here, to pile up with the old entries probably only I read. But I'd really like to just discuss everything - my shyness, when I feel like I could have done more, when I just feel sad and far away - with someone who could help me out. Maybe someone at Church; I have Hazel and Jeri's numbers. I wouldn't like to bother them, but they're nice people, so I guess they wouldn't mind all that much.

Sara and I lengthened Emily's tie for Year 9 Prize day. Excessively. We wanted her to be the first pupil in history told to shorten their tie!

I wrote a letter to Eric at last. Letters frustrate me. I can never quite say as much as I want in them. I like talking to Eric on the phone, but I can't really afford the phone call up to Liverpool and it's not particularly fair to expect him to do it all the time. I sent him a picture of my cat. He has a gorgeous cat called Mr. Ginger. And a neighbour whose name is apparently also Mr. Ginger!!

Put more stories on my GeekHost site. Some of them are terrible. That's deliberate - decided to show myself for the writer I am - completely. Good and bad. If I can't show it on a website, how am I going to show a publisher? Could someone sign my guestbook on that site? 'Cause I don't think it works. If it doesn't, how about e-mailing me?

Random word for today:

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