A Curious Girl: Sigh...

Hi folks, happy Lent. Am not feeling terribly Lenten. Have made a vague attempt to be veggie as a response to my housemates' challenge to be vegan for Lent.

The Quaker "chaplain" came to talk at Christian Focus last night. She even attended my rather impromptu Bible study beforehand (Much to my own mystification, I seem to be Christian Focus's Worship Rep). I really like her; I like Quakers in general despite having lived with two for over six months :) She talked about why she was a Quaker and explained a little about what Quakers do... I identified with her story a lot - she talked about how difficult she had found it being a Christian when she left the support of the Christian Union at university, and how she'd stopped going to church because she felt like a hypocrite. She spoke of how she wanted God to be real for her but how he never seemed to be. She said she found a reality in Quaker worship (they have a shared time of silence - if someone feels moved to speak, they will do).

Meh, I know the feeling.
Being a theological deviant doesn't help... I miss St. Weirdo's like crazy, I've missed the last few weeks because of work. I ask for Sunday evenings off but more often than not I'm the only person even vaguely available to help. So I give very grudgingly. I'm not exactly a cheerful giver :) Though I'm working on that.

She finished the meeting with five minutes of silence. I had a really good about three minutes before my butterfly mind started thinking about these books I read ages ago. I've got out of the habit of silent prayer. And the habit of everything really. I'm currently making the slowest ever progress through the Gospel of Mark. I want God to be real for me. I wish life made sense.

I think I might have to take a bit of Annual Leave :)

So I have decided - I'm moving to Bradford in July. This is very exciting - it just about makes up for how upset I am about leaving York in July! I've a few ideas about what to do next workwise... will make some enquiries.

Random word for today:

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